The Hollywood music scene

Peter Matz

In the early sixties, before departing for distant shores, I did a concert with Shirley Bassey.

Once the concert began it became apparent that certain members of the orchestra, including our bass trombonist, had taken on a substantial amount of liquid refreshment. However, all appeared to be proceeding quite well until, to our chagrin, Ms. Bassey's MD called up "Johnny One Note", an arrangement by Ted Brennan. This song contains a fairly significant "work section" which calls out the names of various instruments in the orchestra, paying off with "...and the Big Trombone". The arrangement contained all the appropriate musical phrases to be played by each of the soloists named, each one followed by a Ba-Rum-Pum-Pum played on the bass trombone.

Here is how the performance went that fateful Sunday night.

First chorus:

"...and the clarinet," (Ba-Rum-Pum-Pum, on the bass trombone;)

"...and the Piccolo," (Ba-Rum-Pum-Pum, again on the bass trombone;)

"...and the Lady Harp," (Ba-Rum-Pum-Pum;)

"...and the violin," (Ba-Rum-Pum Pum;)

"...and the castanets," (Ba-Rum-Pum-Pum;)

"...and the BIG TROMBONE," (......................Aah... f___ it...)


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